Blergh

*Warning: might be slightly graphic*

For the past month I've been trying to come up with a new birth control plan. When I first heard of Depo Privera (the shot), I knew of the weight gain, the irregular bleeding, and most important of all, no more periods-after the irregular bleeding. Well currently I'm on the shot, and I hate it with a passion.

First, the bleeding went on for literally five weeks. I'm not talking about the normal bleeding after you have the baby, I mean this was after the first shot. I figured that perhaps after this, there would be no more bleeding. I was kind of right. No bleeding occured for maybe 2-2 1/2 months. However, tthe shot began to mess with my mind. I felt no desire to do anything, I felt hopeless, empty, you name it. And of course I noticed the weight gain during this time. Fantastic. And worst of all, I had no sexual desire. None. Kinda hard when you have a baby in the room 24/7 as well. But then something changed. I no longer felt empty, the weight-well it stayed, and the desire came back. But what happened a few days later? You guessed it: the bleeding returned.

I can't take it anymore. In my world, I thought I would bleed at first, gain a little weight, and would no longer get my period. Short, quick and to the point. Why won't I ever learn that nothing is easy, especially birth control? I started my search for the next control method, and just about every one has the same side effects. At least the side effects I'm concerned about. What I gathered is that whatever I choose, it needs to be non-hormonal. That seems to be the problem with the weight gain. So not wanting to rely just on what I read, I went to the wonderful website, called cafemom.com. Moms of all walks of life come here to chat, ask questions, make friends-all that good stuff. I posted a topic about my birth control problem, and I wanted to see who likes what, and which method seems to work best. It was a confetti bag of answers. Some people liked Mirena, others didn't. Some people gained weight on the pill, others didn't. One mom even broke her back because of low bone density due to the shot. Needless to say, I am still at a loss.

I've always hated condoms, but they're looking really good to me right now. Nothing is ever simple when it comes to the human body. I'd like to know how this story ends, but right now, it remains an open chapter....

By the way, I don't do abstinence-kudos to those who do